Sweet and Tender Mercies

Dear Friends and Family,
Our days continue to get more difficult and our boots are heavy as Matt continues to grow weaker.  He is still able to walk, but only to the bedroom, bathroom and living room.  He eats very little and doesn't like to talk as it expends too much energy.  He sleeps a lot as well.  He is very yellow and my children say his eyes are the color of a yellow highlighter pen.  The most difficult part of this journey is watching a healthy body slowly become only a shell of what it once was.

Even though things are hard I am always amazed at how God blesses us and lets us feel his presence and love. This week a dear friend that I met at the cancer center came to stay and help me.  She lost her son to colon cancer about a year ago and we have stayed in touch with each other.  She was amazing and was truly a gift from God.  She cooked, cleaned, played games with my children, listened and offered little gems of wonderful advice.  I told her when she left that I was feeling that same feeling of saddness and anxiousness that I felt each time my mom left after coming to help me after each of my children were born.  :)

These past few weeks we have had so many calls, messages, texts, etc. from people all over the world who wanted to let us know that they were thinking of us and praying for us.  Others who live close have brought in meals, treats, fruit, flowers, etc.  My sisters and my mom have been there for me every single time I have needed them.  They seem to know when I am struggling and they are always there to love me and let me cry.  How blessed I am to have been born into such a strong and loving family.

On Saturday my sisters daughter was baptized and at the baptism her children sang "A Child's Prayer".  The words are below.  The younger ones sang the first verse and then her 16 year old son song sang the second verse.  As he began to sing the second verse I had this wonderful, beautiful overwhelming feeling of love cover me completely.  I felt my Saviors love for me so strongly; it was a feeling a could not deny even if I tried.  My body was racked with sobs of gratefulness that He was letting me know that he IS there for me and for my family; that He is real and that He can hear my pleas of help.  How incredibly grateful I am that I KNOW that He lives and that he loves all of us with a love stronger than any love we can ever imagine.

1. 1. Heavenly Father, are you really there?
   And do you hear and answer ev'ry child's prayer?
   Some say that heaven is far away,
   But I feel it close around me as I pray.
   

   Heavenly Father, I remember now

   Something that Jesus told disciples long ago:

   "Suffer the children to come to me."

   Father, in prayer I'm coming now to thee.
2. 2. Pray, he is there;
   Speak, he is list'ning.
   You are his child;
   His love now surrounds you.
   He hears your prayer;
   He loves the children.
   Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of heav'n.
3. Words and music: Janice Kapp Perry, b. 1938
   (c) 1984 by Janice Kapp Perry.