Mixed Bag of News Today

Today was a good and bad day. It was good because we got the news that the tumors in the liver and the lungs have shrunk significantly and Matt's tumor marker is now down to 3! This is great news but then the doctor had to bring me back down to earth as he explained that Matt will never get cured of this cancer, but will have to use chemotherapy medications to control and maintain it.

I had assumed incorrectly that at the end of the 12 rounds of chemotherapy if Matt responded well he would be done. We found out today that after the 12 treatments Matt will continue to have to come to the hospital every 3 weeks to continue on the Avastin medication indefinately. This medicine is given by IV but only takes about an hour. Maybe Matt can take do this at the cancer center in Safford??

It was just such a let down to find out that we will be battling this cancer for the rest of Matt's life. I feel so tired and truthfully a bit discouraged. The doctor told us that because Matt has so many tumors in his liver he is not a candidate for liver surgery and that he will not be having any surgery on his colon either. This was a suprise because initially there was talk of surgery on the colon. I think now that the tumor there has shrunk so much there really isn't a reason to do surgery. He explained it like this, he said that to have surgery you have to be off chemo medicines for about 7 weeks prior and 7 weeks after which will put Matt at a great risk of the tumors growing and spreading again. Because he has extensive cancer in his body the tumors will always come back with or without surgery so better to not put him through surgery.

After the doctor saw how distraught I was with the news he was so kind and said that if we wanted to we could speak with the surgeon after Matt's chemo treatments to see if he would consider doing surgery if that is what we really wanted.

I looked online at a forum where patients and caregivers of colon cancer talk about their struggles and I saw for myself that what our oncologist says is true. I noticed that everyone of the cancer patients who underwent liver and colon surgery had their cancer come back, usually within a year. So if that is what Matt is destined for then why put him through the pain of surgery. From what I read in the forum, both surgeries are very long, difficult and painful.

I don't know.....maybe after the 12 treatments we will at least consult with the surgeon to get his opinion. Right now I am still reeling from the shock of it all. I knew going into this that the prognosis was not good, but it is still hard to hit these bumps along the way.

Sorry this post is not so happy....I am feeling pretty down right now. Matt on the other hand is feeling pretty optimistic. He said he knew all along that he would not overcome this cancer, but instead would just fight it best he could and prolong his life as long as possible. I hope that will be a very long time!